If you’re in an open relationship (also known as ethical non-monogamy or consensual non-monogamy), you and your partner need to establish a set of rules for how this arrangement will work. These rules will cover a wide range of topics, from sexual to emotional boundaries and more.
Ultimately, these rules will help you decide if this kind of relationship is right for you and your partner and if it’s sustainable over the long term. In order to determine these rules, you’ll need to have honest communication with your partner about what each of you wants out of the arrangement, and how you can ensure that those goals and expectations are met.
There are a few key things to consider when it comes to establishing open relationship rules:
1. How much time you both want to devote to your primary relationships, and how much you’re willing to spend with other partners outside of this arrangement. This will help you determine whether you’re actively or passively exploring other relationships, and how this might affect your relationship.
2. What sexual boundaries you’re comfortable with and what you’re not. This will include how many sexual partners you’re okay with, and whether you’re comfortable with things like penetrative sex.
3. Other rules, like people and safety. This includes who’s invited into the relationship and how often you and your partner will discuss new partners, whether you have veto power over each other’s partners or not, and what your expectations are around things like STI testing and using protection. How to establish open relationship rules